Fabulous freebies: magazines

Fabulous freebies: magazines.

Lovely locks by ‘hair romance’

A few weeks ago, I blogged about how to look a million dollars on a budget. I mentioned there that I had a talented friend to do my hair- but, bride or not, what if you want  to get a stunning look yourself for free?

I’ve found this fabulous blog for any girls (brides or otherwise) wanting to get the perfect twist and pin look for a special occasion.

From http://www.hairromance.com

Aussie, Christina takes you through hundreds of chic styles step by step in her easy to access ‘hairromance’ blog. Even if you dont fancy doing it yourself there is tonnes to inspire any bride to be- especially as it doesn’t major on ‘wedding hair’ and just covers simple, beautiful styles.

I can’t wait to try some of them out!

Can you look a million dollars on a budget?

I’ve already blogged about my lovely gown and homemade bouquet, but what about the rest of it? Bridal hair and make up can add hundreds more onto the budget, so what to do if you’re trying to cut costs?

I have never had very good experiences of make up done by other people, so I wasn’t keen on the idea of getting someone in on my big day. The main thing I wanted was to look myself (but the best version of myself I could be!). 

Although I used to be a bit of a make-up-o-holic in my teens and early twenties, my look has mellowed over time and since my other half prefers the natural look I very often wear no make up at all, or just a splash of vaseline rosy or gloss on my lips. I’m also a BIG fan of Benetint, as it gives a really natural flush of colour and is very durable.

My make-up loving days gave me the confidence to decide to do my own bridal look, and I am really glad I did. I spent a bit of money on some quality products- and made use of some deals on magazines* and freebies from No.7 at Boots.

I am fortunate to have a number of friends who are a dab hand at hairdressing, so I enlisted the help of my old flatmate Marianne (a physio in real life) and entrusted her with my locks on the big day. After some discussions and even buying a cheap veil just in case, I decided for simplicity and went for just lovely hair and no veil. Marianne did an amazing job and my hair not only lasted to the end of the night but looked awesome for the first few days of honeymoon too!

Getting the look

My ‘natural bride’ look consisted of:

• No.7 tinted moisturiser
• Benetint (cheeks and lip stain) by Benefit. This was a gift, but canny brides could recently have got a free sample sufficient for wedding and honeymoon with Glamour magazine*
• Benefit ‘Primpcess’ eye kit (with eye pencil, mascara, brow definer, eyeshadow and highlighter) I got this at cut price on an easyjet flight for £20
• Jemma Kidd lipgloss ‘Candy’ (free with glamour mag*)

* Budget brides to be should keep a look out from free magazine make up deals. In the UK, Glamour are particularly good at these- especially my fave brand of Benefit.

the finished look

Clowning around

The clown theme

 

So, having decided to go with a fun, circus/clown feel to our wedding, we booked an entertainer from Froggle Parties to wander around the tables.

Dressed in a typical froggle outfit, Ben our entertainer did a sterling job making children of all ages (including the very grown up ones) smile.

From bubbles to balloon hats, the guests had lots of fun, and combined with our red nose favours the entertainment provided some great photo opportunities too!

Froggle: http://www.froggleparties.com

One of my friends, a mum of three said it was “The most child friendly” wedding she’s been too- and was worried the kids would expect all weddings to come complete with clown and comedy swords!

I’d initially thought the entertainer would just be there to keep the kids happy, but actually the way it worked out he ended up keeping everyone happy- and the end result was just as good as having a magician or more ‘grown up’ performer for our guests and really cemented the joyful feel of the day. Very good value for money!

To love cherish and… …submit?

 

I don’t know for sure, but I’m guessing there were a few raised eyebrows behind me when I said the word ‘submit’ in my wedding vows.

Ideas of obedience and submission can have ugly connotations in the western world. Even within the wider church of England, the word ‘obey’ was made optional in the vows because it was feared that it could be used by unscrupulous husbands to justify domestic abuse. The recent royal wedding left it out.

So, why would I promise to love, cherish and submit to Michael?

Well first off, you need to put that submission into context. My actual vow was to submit “As the church submits to Christ”. Michael in turn had just vowed to love me “As Christ loves the church“.

So what does that mean?

Well, personally I think that Michael has the tougher calling: Christ loved the church so much that he gave up his life. “There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” (John 15:3)

In Christian marriage, a man is called to love his wife “like his own body” and to ultimately be willing to lay himself down for her. It’s a reflection of the sacrificial love that God has for his people.

Christ is head of the church, but his headship is a serving one. He washed his disciples feet and he made the ultimate sacrifice on the cross. He is not tyrannical or manipulative. Despite having all authority he humbled himself to the point of death, and is loving, serving, merciful and gentle.

This is the Lord Michael and I both follow, and Michael is called to follow him in the servant leadership of our family.

In response to the love of Christ,every Christian (all together “the church”) has made an individual decision to call him ‘Lord’ and to submit to that servant king who first loved us, and who laid down his life that we might live. As I promised to submit to Michael- it was a picture of that relationship between God and his people. Him loving us unto death and us responding to that love by following him.

There is a big misconception that submission must mean that somehow the wife is less valuable or equal. Jesus is God, equally God with the Father and the Spirit. Christ though, submitted to the authority of his Father. The night before he died, he did pray that he might not have to go through the pain of the cross- but then submitted himself to the Father’s will- “Not my will, but yours”. Does this make him less worthy? Not at all. He is still God.

As such, whilst Michael is called to follow Christ’s servant leadership, I am called to follow Christ’s example of submission. We are equal, but with slightly differing roles- both of which follow Jesus’ example.

I guess the one thing I would say at this point is that you can only promise to submit if you know that your husband is taking his vow to love you like Christ loves the church seriously. Sure- we are human so he is not going to be perfect in his attempts to be Christ-like, but unless you are sure that he will try and put your needs first and love and cherish and serve you- then a life of ‘submission’ would be very one sided- and not at all the reflection of God’s love that it was intended.

In reality, in a world full of ‘self’ and ‘my needs’ and ‘me me me’ the Christian wedding vows should result in two people both putting the other’s needs before themselves: Serving one another and looking after one another. “You” should become more important than “I”.

…and noses are red too

which isn’t a comment about colds or alcoholics!

We decided that rather than go for sugared almonds or other kinds of overpriced table favours, we wanted to do something charity related. But a little piece of paper saying “a donation has been made in your name” whilst commendable,  somehow didn’t feel majorly fun.

The solution?

we did something ‘funny for money’ and raided our local Sainsburys for 150 red nose day noses (bought before the March deadline).

We put them into stylish balloon weight boxes (cheaper than ‘official’ favour boxes) along with some colourful pots of bubbles and the all important map to the boat.

On the outside- a nicely presented wedding favour. On the inside- a little box of fun! They provided much laughter and photo opportunities as well as being a charity donation towards a good cause.

Easier to pull off when your other half is a clown- but it could work at any circus themed/carnival wedding.

"something funny for money"

Roses are red…

And if you’re on a budget, and a little bit crafty- they can be wooden too!

Whilst I do adore fresh flowers, I’m also a little bit allergic and asthmatic, and we were on a tight budget, so, as I blogged about before the wedding, I decided to make my own floral decorations/bouquets from wooden roses.

The roses can be bought from numerous suppliers on ebay in a whole range of crazy colours. Unless you are after thousands, they tend to average at around £10-£15 for 100-200 stems.

I bought 100 red, 50 ivory/cream, 50 yellow and 50 blue stems, along with some grasses, ribbon, floristry pins and tape.

I started off making my bouquet and found the wire stems of the wooden roses very easy to manipulate into shape. I went for a small tear-drop shape, and worked on the principle of 3s (which is something I’d read about in flower arranging articles- basically putting three roses at the centre, and working out from there, adding three of each colour as I went.)

I added some curled grasses, secured it with green floristry tape and covered the handle in organza ribbon before adding some pearl headed pins to the centre of some of the roses for added ‘bridal’ effect.  The resulting flowers were bright, fun and looked really nice in photos 🙂

I almost wish I hadn’t thrown them to the single ladies at the end of the night!!

I made button holes using the same flowers, and combined colours to make a bunch for the lectern in church. The remaining stems were wound around archways or put into vases for the reception.

One of the best buys of the whole wedding I think!

Photograph taken by Jonathan Self; all rights reserved 2011. http://www.jonathanself.co.uk

The budget wedding dress

As I posted a few months ago, I took the plunge and ordered a dress online, which I then got customised by a local seamstress  in Putney, as well as getting the normal alterations you would expect (taking up length).

The total cost of the gown including delivery was £230 and I paid £200 for the alterations and customisation (including a lovely wrap which was made from the excess material). This was amazingly good value given the volume of material involved and the fact that my seamstress was taking up 4 layers of material when she altered the length.

Normal wedding dress alterations apparently come in at around £150, so for essentially £50 extra I got a totally customised gown- Awesome!

The proof of the dressing is, in the wearing, however- so without further ado here’s an unofficial snap:

the final creation!

I now pronounce you

Man and wife!

Man and wife!!

So, the lack of blogging over the last few weeks has been because on 16th April myself and My lovely man finally said ‘I will’ infront of our friends and family and before God.

We’ve been chilling out (Everyone had said we’d need a break after the stress of organising the wedding, but I didn’t realise HOW tired we’d be, so the last two weeks R&R were so appreciated) and remembering the wonderful colourful joyful occassion that was our wedding.

There’s so much to tell- and lots of things that I couldn’t blog about before, because they were a surprise, so now I’ll be continue the blog with snippets, reviews, photos and and some further top tips.

Not got our official pics yet, but when we do, I’ll post pics of the dresses/flowers so that you  can see how the plans all turned out.

The day was truly amazing- and I’ll tell you more about that in due course but I still maintain that the marriage is the most exciting (and important) bit.

Right now, I’m sitting in my new house, the bank holiday sunshine is streaming in through the window, and my new husband just brought me breakfast in bed. We’ve spent the last few days making our home, and enjoying living together for the first time. We have had the odd disagreement, and our car just broke down for the 4th time in the space of a few weeks (I wouldn’t want to paint an unrealistic picture of wedded bliss), but we’ve grown together even in the last few weeks and I cant really describe how right and natural it feels to be his wife.

The glamour/fun and excitement of the wedding is a great memory, but the reality of travelling through life with my best friend by my side is starting to sink in- and I’m so so so excited (and overjoyed) about that journey!

Wedding prep and marriage prep

 

For the last month, my hubby to be and I have been attending a ‘marriage preparation’ course. Preparing for the marriage, is in my view much more important than preparing for the day- since the day is over in 24 hours, whereas the marriage is for a lifetime.

We’re attending the one run by our church, St Helen’s, but faith aside, many now believe that doing marriage courses really help set the right foundations and protect your future marriage from the outset.  Mostly, I think because any course worth its weight will address the expectations that both sides have before tying the knot.

We did a hugely detailed ‘expectations survey’ before starting our marriage prep, and whilst it was good chance to talk through some big issues (money/ children/ sex etc) we had already discussed most of it in the course of our relationship. However, such discussions are essential- in her book ” The art of Marriage” Catherine Blyth notes that many modern couples today have not properly discussed such big things as children and finances before they walk down the aisle! Crazy- if you ask me!

The main thing I will take away from our course though, is that when you get married, you are marrying a wonderful, but imperfect person, and that you yourself are not perfect either. To put it bluntly- we are both two sinners, who are trying to forge a life together.  As such, the pattern of repentance, forgiveness and reconciliation (that incidently is at the heart of the christian faith) is essential for anyone wanting a lasting marriage. That, and the remembering of the vows that glue us together more than even love itself.

“I made a mistake” “I was wrong” “I’m sorry” “I forgive you” “I love you” are some of the most essential words in any relationship- especially marriage, and I suspect we will be saying them many times over the coming years.